Gum in the Urinal — A Modern Horror Story

Mr. Curmudgeon Rants

You know what proves some people are truly terrible? Gum in urinals. That’s right — chewed-up, slobbery gum just sitting there like it belongs. Spoiler: it doesn’t. It doesn’t flush, it doesn’t dissolve, and someone — a real human being — has to reach in and scrape it out by hand.

Why? Why would anyone do this? It’s not a trash can. It’s not a chew-and-shoot contest. It’s a urinal. And yet, every time I walk into a public restroom, there it is — a wad of Juicy Fruit mocking both plumbing and humanity.

There’s no excuse for it. It’s not laziness — it’s next-level inconsiderate. The same type of jerk who parks across two spaces or leaves their shopping cart in the middle of the lot. Society is hanging by a thread, and that thread is apparently stuck to the bottom of a urinal.

To whoever’s doing this: you’re the reason we can’t have clean restrooms or faith in mankind. Please, for the love of janitors everywhere — find a trash can. Or better yet, chew with purpose and dignity.

Some humans, man. Just the worst.

Matt Harding’s 2008 Dancing Video

Mr. Curmudgeon Inspiration

Matt Harding’s 2008 video showing him dancing with people all across the world brought joy to tens of millions. In looking over a now defunct blog, I rediscovered this internet treasure.

Here is the video in all of its glory:

Where the Hell is Matt? 2008

Matt’s joy while dancing badly (his own words) is palpable. While his movements emulate a flailing chicken, his infectious smile highlights every scene. My favorite scenes are the ones featuring young children and unique landscapes. I’m pretty sure one of Matt’s favorites is experiencing zero gravity at Nellis Airspace in Nevada. What a treat.

I also love the soundtrack. I can’t imagine another one accompanying this video. Thank you, Matt. Thank you for sharing this video in 2008 and thank you for keeping it around for me to enjoy in 2020. It has aged marvelously.

    Falcon Warriors

    Mr. Curmudgeon Sports

    Three valiant warriors descended upon the North American Teams Championship. Hailing from Austin, TX and Tucson, AZ and sporting custom designed shirts, they demonstrated that mental toughness and guile can often overcome the advantages of excellent technique, formal training, and youth.

    The trio finished second in their division, leaving a trail of tears in their wake. While none of these guys was caught crying immediately after a loss, tears may have been shed later on.